JUST WHERE HE (GOD) NEEDS ME

24 years ago I stood before my session at The Salvation Army's Officer Training College in Melbourne and sang "Just where he needs me, My Lord has placed me, Just where he needs me there will I be..."

I'm not sure that I really understood what I was saying! Nor did I ever imagine that my promise would take me to the places and require me to make the choices I have. You see I believe passionately and completely that God has - through my life experiences, through the models of my parents, through the studies that I have completed and through confirmation of my wife and daughter - asked me to be available; to go and to leave!

Let me be honest: I love travelling, I love flying, I love immersing myself in other cultures, I love being able to help others, I love being part of a life-transforming experience in a persons life. But I really don't like being away from Sandy and Alexis as long as I am at times.

But you know what: I will continue to make the decision to go as long as I can and when/if I am asked because WE believe that this is exactly where and what God made US to do. It is not a choice we make because we're trying to get away from one each other, or trying to frustrate our leaders, it is a choice we make because we know (through accident of birth and no merit of our own) that we are so privileged and have so much.

Emergency Services work is, for me, simultaneously the most amazing privilege and the most painful decision. God, just where you need me, there will I be.

FRUSTRATIONS

So this week again our Camp Manager and her team were reminded that the heroes can quickly become the enemy. It's a natural part of the cycle of disaster recovery and one that is not limited by culture, language or cause of emergency.

In Sri Lanka following the Tsunami (2004) we saw this reversal of fortunes after about 4 weeks. In Whittlesea (Australia) after the Black Saturday bushfires (2009) we saw it begin a little earlier, after about 2 weeks. Here, in Place de la Paix, Haiti (the IDP camp comprising about 20,000 people that The Salvation Army manages) the tide of emotions manifest through blame and anger, celebration and joy has ebbed and flowed over the life of the camp. But this week it got nasty again and took a few by surprise.

It often starts because survivors know, or believe, that there are resources available, but they remain hungry, cold, wet or sick. They hear that the material they need is on the dock, but isn't being released. They see reports claiming that the government has the promise of millions of dollars (and euros etc) but it isn't coming. And the only people that they can see, the only people that they can get to are the rescuers - the only people that continue to be present with them are the relief agents - they have been there from the beginning. So who else can a survivor vent their frustrations on, who else will listen - the people that make the big decisions aren't around, and seem to be deaf and blind to the reality.

So when the frustrations, anger and yelling comes, and it will, remember that's what you signed up for (that's why you get the emblazoned vest with all the pockets). It's hard not to take it personally, but you know what: it's not about you. You have to cop it, you have to manage it, but remember why you're here and like someone else said "do it for the least, the hungry, the tired, the cold, the naked, and after they've yelled, do it again" (my paraphrase) and by these acts they will know who represent.

LET THEM EAT SOUP

On January 1, 1804, Haiti (Haitian Creole: Ajiti, land of high mountains) proclaimed its independence and became the second independent state in the Western Hemisphere and the first free black republic in the world. This unprecedented victory over a colonial power symbolised the aspirations of enslaved and exploited peoples around the world.

Today (206 years after independence) outside the now destroyed Presidential Palace in Port-au-Prince you will see (an unscathed by earthquake) statue that symbolizes this struggle for freedom. Called “Neg Maron” (Brown Man) it depicts a slave blowing a conch shell while holding a machete in his other hand with a broken chain and handcuff. The conch shell was used to call escaped slaves to gather; the machete was used to cut sugar cane and to fight off the French; and the broken chain symbolises slaves breaking from bondage and reclaiming their freedom.

[By the way: When the French ruled, they established a law stipulating that only they, the ruling class, the rich and free, could eat soup. Their New Year's Day tradition was to eat soup. But when Haiti proclaimed its independence, all Haitians - slaves and generals, land owners and cane cutters – all ate soup. It was their way of demonstrating that everyone was equal and the tradition has been adopted – now Haitians eat soup on Independence Day!]

Neg Maron has become one of the ubiquitous symbols of Haiti. At just about any, and every, souvenir stall in the city you’ll find wooden, stone; large and small representations of Neg Maron.

I wonder if anyone has contemplated the paradox of symbolism that exists today. Looming huge in the background the now imploded and inevitably demolished (White House) Presidential Palace. One of the country’s most powerful symbols of authority, its sterile whiteness and imagined luxury protected from the commoners by fences and guns. The seat of power and some would say the blockade of progress. In the foreground, casting a shadow on the manicured lawns of the broken Palace, Neg Maron, historical symbol of freedom, equality and enterprise; image of celebration and new opportunity stands unprotected and disaffected by the forces of nature. I wonder if you can imagine the disdain with which he faces another attack, and stands! Which symbol will dominate, or perhaps inform Haiti’s future?

WHERE AM I?

Have you ever asked that question?

I remember as a little boy, (for those rude enough to think it, yes even shorter than I am now) our family went camping. My brother and I went exploring alone, and we got lost. I remember being frightened and I remember my big brother yelling out for Mum and Dad, only to discover that we were actually only about 50 meteres away, we just couldn't see them!

Anyway, wouldn't it have been great if we had GPS technology back then? Well we do now, so if you have Google Earth you can check out where I live, where I work, and some of the places I visit. (Just be careful when you plug in the coordinates if you're in Australia, it is quite a dizzying ride from Australia around the globe to Haiti.

• Home/Office: 18°35'22.95"N / 72°14'23.00"W
• DHQ (New Site due to earthquake damage of old buildings): 18°33'26.69"N / 72°19'37.93"W
• Place de la Paix (Salvo run IDP Camp): 18°33'25.04"N / 72°20'15.20"W
• Children's Home: 18°33'24.13"N / 72°20'12.58"W
• School: 18°33'21.69"N / 72°20'11.94"W
• (Old) DHQ (Back) & Clinic Front: 18°33'23.93"N / 72°20'9.84"W
• Port-au-Prince Corps: 18°33'23.18"N / 72°20'11.08"W

Just note that the images (I get) are dated 25 January 2010, (13 days after the quake) so it looks like the IDP camp is half full, let me assure you that it is now completely full and overflowing. (In the 'Fly to' box type in coordinates in the following format: 18.332318, -72.201108, you should be near Port-au-Prince, if not navigate using the coordinates that appear at the bottom of the screen.)

JAN 12TH EARTHQUAKE KEY FACTS AND FIGURES

Almost 3.5 million people experienced strong-to-extreme shaking in the January 12 earthquake, including the entire population of Port-au-Prince (2.8 million, equivalent to the City of Chicago, or Madrid (2.8) or Taipei (2.6)). Source: Office of the Special Envoy

The Haitian Government estimates that 222,570 people have died and 300,572 have been injured, but the true death toll will never be known. Source: DPC, referenced in OCHA Situation Report #25, March 2010; Haitian Government referenced in the Flash Appeal

1.5 million children and young people under 18 were directly or indirectly affected by the quake – approximately 720,000 are aged between 6 and 12. Source: Education Cluster referenced in the CAP

Displacement

At the peak of displacement, around 2.3 million people left their homes including 302,000 children. Source: Department Protection Civile referenced in the CAP; Education Cluster referenced in the CAP

1.5 million people are living in spontaneous settlements across the affected area including an estimated 309,000 children. Source: IOM; Education Cluster in the CAP

At their peak, over 1300 spontaneous settlements were identified by the Camp Coordination and Camp Management cluster. Source: DTM May 2010

After the earthquake, 604,215 people left Port-au-Prince and the West Department. An estimated 160,000 persons moved from Port-au-Prince to the border area with the Dominican Republic. Source: OCHA Situation report #25, March 2010

Destruction

188,383 houses collapsed or were badly damaged and 105,000 were completely destroyed. Key buildings destroyed including the Presidential Palace, the Parliament, the Cathedral and the majority of government buildings – in total 60 percent of government, administrative and economic infrastructure was destroyed. Source: PDNA and the Government of Haiti

4,992 schools were affected by the earthquake – 23% of all schools in Haiti. Of these, 3,978 were either damaged or destroyed – 80% of the affected schools. These schools closed after the quake. Source: Ministry of Education assessment referenced in the CAP

80 percent of schools in Port-au-Prince and 60 percent of the schools in the South and West departments have been destroyed or damaged. Source: UNICEF

Eight hospitals were totally destroyed and 22 seriously damaged, more than half of the 49 hospitals in the three regions affected by the earthquake. The Health cluster recommends that all 30 be rebuilt. Source: Health Cluster referenced in the CAP

The total value of damage and losses caused by the January 12 earthquake is estimated at US$7.8 billion (US$4.3 billion represents physical damage and US$3.5 billion are economic losses). The damage and losses are equivalent of about more than 120 percent of the 2009 gross domestic product (GDP). This represents the highest economic impact of a disaster compared to national income in 35 years. Source: PDNA

750,000 women and girls of childbearing age were affected by the earthquake. Of these, approximately 63,000 are pregnant, and approximately 7,000 babies have been delivered every month since earthquake. Source: UNFPA

The earthquake reduced Haiti’s gross domestic product by 70 percent. Source: Office of the Special Envoy

HAITI BEFORE JAN 12TH

Many Haitians, when they speak of the earthquake, refer only to “before” – before, in 35 seconds, they lost so much: friends, family, homes, schools, churches – and their visions of the future.

What happened here on January 12th was a disaster of a magnitude that would have set any country reeling. Over 222,570 people have died, 300,572 injured and a staggering 2.3 million – nearly one quarter of the population – displaced. Despite these very difficult and painful circumstances, the humanitarian response was one of the largest of its kind ever mounted and continues every day to help survivors of this tragedy. It is the largest urban natural catastrophe in recorded history, and it devastated a country already deep in humanitarian crisis.

In 2009:

• 58 percent of children were under-nourished.
• 58 percent of the population lacked access to clean water.
• 55 percent of Haitians lived on less than $1.25 per day.
• Per capita annual income was $660.00
• Earthquake followed devastating hurricanes in 2008, which affected 800,000 people.
• Deforestation had left the nation with less than two percent forest cover.
Source: Office of the Special envoy

• On UNDP’s Human Development Index 2009, Haiti came 149 out of 182 countries, the lowest in the whole of the Americas
• Probability of not living to 40 was 18.5% - higher than Eritrea
• Life expectancy 61 years – worse than in Myanmar
  Source: UNDP HDR 2009

• 40% of households did not have reliable access to adequate food
• More than half a million children between the ages of 6 and 12 did not attend school
• 38% of the population over 15 was completely illiterate
• In 2001, 56% of Haitians were living below the $1-a-day line. Source: PDNA March 2010
• Unemployment in Haiti was up to 80%. Source: Protection Cluster referenced in the CAP

Children

• Up to 173,000 children regularly exploited as domestic workers
• 50,000 children separated from their families in institutions
• At least 2,000 trafficked annually through and to the Dominican Republic
  Source: Child Protection Cluster referenced in the CAP

• 50-55% of children were not enrolled in school
  Source: Education Cluster referenced in the CAP

Infrastructure

• Only 3,400 kilometres of road, of which only 800 km was paved
• Only 12.5% of the population had access to electricity
Source: Ministry of Works, Haiti 2006 – NB this goes up to 45% in Port au Prince

Agriculture

• 60% of the active working population lives in rural areas and depends on agriculture.
  Source: PDNA
• Haiti was still recovering from the hurricanes of 2008 which devastated 70% of the agricultural sector. Source: CAP

Health and Nutrition

• 44% of seriously ill or wounded people were unable to access health services prior to the earthquake due to lack of money for fees. Source: CAP
• Acute malnutrition was 4.5% in 2008-9 – including 15,967 children and 1,549 babies under six months
• Up to 60% of children and 46% of women suffered some kind of anemia
  Source: Health and Nutrition Clusters, CAP

SOME GOOD NEWS?

The Haitian Government, and hopefully the people of Haiti, have recieved some good news, even if it is beyond the horizon of caring for the majority who are living under canvas or tin in crowded IDP camps.

On a day when the Transport Union called for a day of stop-work and protest against what it labels "a corrupt government", the International Monetary Fund (IMF) member countries voted to cancel the $268 million debt owed to the IMF and approved a new loan worth $60 million to boost the international reserves. This new three-year loan carries a zero interest rate until the end of 2011 and then, they say, the rate will remain 'low'.

The protests can turn violent and in fact did back in May when students were tear gassed by UN troops to return order. Many residents of Port-au-Prince stocked up on fuel and food in case the worst happened.

I'm glad to say that we have been holed up in our new compound and we have heard and seen no problems and in fact have been told that "nothing happened". The team has spent the day re-organising our world and getting down to some of the administration side of emergency response. After all we need to know what money we have, or don't have, and where it is going.

TEAM HOUSE

Today was "D" Day for IES Haiti. The old has gone, the new has come!

After much energy expended by previous team members we moved our accomodations from the Coconut Villa Hotel and our office from DHQ today and we are now located at #9 Rue Laraunt, Santos 23, Port au Prince. It's a bit of a drive into town, (about 40 minutes - give or take) but this is 'ours' for now!

It is a 'never been lived in' two storey house, actually two identical flats. The bottom floor will be the office and will also have two guest rooms, the top floor is our living quartes; three bedrooms, two bathrooms, kitchen and a lounge. Thanks to Vicki Poff we even have beds and some other 'luxuries'. The mains electricity is on its way, so at the moment we operate on generators and inverters, the internet too is on the way, so at the moment, thanks to Bob Poff, we are on borrowed internet time.

Tonight, I am sitting on the verandah, looking out over a ten foot high concrete wall topped with razor wire, but beyond that, and beyond the row of half built houses, I see a wall of green trees that attempt to hide the cloud covered mountain range in the distance. The rain is pouring down, a slight breeze is moving through the house and, if it wasn't for the generator, it would be nice and quiet.

ONE OF THOSE DAYS

Believe it or not! Not every day on deployment with International Emergency Services is a good one! It's been a day of mental gymnastics in the stadium of disaster and the gymnasium of politics.

Yesterday I spent the morning doing, I think, what most people think of when they imagine emergency services. For me it was distributing food, but it could be building temporary shelters, or providing medical care, or cleaning wells - anything that involves the messy, frustrating, unpredictable, chaotic but amazing adrenalin rush that goes with meeting the needs of a person that has, through no fault of their own, been left in need.

Today was not a poster day for emergency services for me. I spent the day on administration and management, analysing and evaluating the way ahead for the team. The part that makes it all the more difficult is that it will result in me having to terminate the employment of a number of people who have worked with The Salvation Army teams since just after the earthquake.

All of these people have stories, some have been impacted by the quake and all of them have become friends and valued team members during what has been an emotional roller coaster ride for Haiti and the team. They have befriended the imported 'experts' and said 'welcome home'. And in the western hemisphere's poorest country, with over 60% unemployment, they could all do with an ongoing income.

So, to put it bluntly, today sucks. (But that's why I get the T-Shirt!)

DISTRIBUTING BABY FOOD

I could see the delicate aroma that rose in gentle waves from the piles of rotting garbage that lined the thick brown molasses like substance that crept down the canal. 1,400 patient (at this stage) people were already lined up down the bottom end of the canal waiting for the two organisations to deliver on their promises. Brazilian (UN) Soldiers in full gear, an assotrment of armaments and light blue helmets, were already closing down the roads and keeping the people in check.

At 8:30am when our team and two trucks arrived it was already 30 degrees, and 89% humidity. The roads were in grid-lock thanks to our trucks and the huge white UN VW truck; someone had forgotten their job to clear the rubbish from the road so that the trucks could get off the main road and access the distibution point.

We waited while men shoveled garbage and then watched as trucks got bogged in it, spinning wheels creating a beautiful brown sludge waterfall effect with mulched warm garbage. Eventually, trucks, people and material in place we began to fill the bright red Red Shield bags with two slabs of mushed sweet peas or smashed fruit. Sweat poured and muscles ached as slabs of baby food flew from truck to bag - but laughter and smiles (together with litres of drinking water) drove the energy levels and people were served.

The Salvo team worked hard today, and enjoyed their work. You would have been proud to watch them work: to see them not just hand out food, but stop to offer a smile and a word of encouragement, to help an old lady carry her load, to kneel down to look into the eyes of a child - to offer people that had lost much if not all a moment of dignity and respect.

MRE

I have now been introduced to the MRE!

Meals are (very) expensive at the Coconut Villa Hotel (our team accomodations in Port au Prince) so, thanks to the US Military, the team has been eating MRE packs on the weekend. Thanks to those that have gone before me we have a box full of the reject bits and a few complete packs left.

These Meals-Ready-to-Eat (MRE) packs are always like a lucky dip. But yesterday I won the jackpot! I chose a Vegetarian pack which came complete with a pack of M&Ms and a Chocloate (flavoured) energy bar. And then today I 'enjoyed' two crackers sandwiched together with jalapino flavoured cheese spread.

There's always a new experience to be enjoyed on deployments with The Salvos!

PARADOXE DU HAITI

In a place like Haiti and a time like this you see sights that have the ability to move you to tears, sights that make you laugh and others that leave you nonplussed. Today has been a day that has travelled the spectrum.

The day began with a tour of Place de la Paix IDP camp. (This is the IDP camp that The Salvation Army is managing that provides shelter and security for approximately 20,000 people in Port au Prince.) It takes about half an hour to walk the circumference of the camp (if you don't get stopped too often) and on the way you might see:

• An amazingly well stocked tarpaulin and tin shop that sells all kinds of things: medical pills of all colours and sizes; tins of Jack Mackerel and condensed milk, televisions, pregnancy pottery, rice, salt, grains, beans, fried dried fish and so much more
• Two UNICEF child safe tents, one with rows of little smiling children copying the words of a teacher who is instructing by use of a mega phone, the second tent with teenagers dancing to Celine Dion and Amazing Grace
• Children playing in the dirty, smelly water - the older one pushing a small suitcase on wheels with a younger brother sitting in the half unzipped case
• Women sitting on the ground with large metal basins full of soapy water washing clothes until they are spotless
• Young girls doing each others hair
• Food cooking on small charcoal fires: deep fried fish and other unidentifiable delicacies
• Little children chasing us, holding our hands and feeling your arm to see if the white comes off, and what all the hair is doing on your arms. Then trying to lift up your pants legs to see if you are the same colour down there (only to find socks that hide the skin)
• Children racing to see us and shouting the ubiquitous greeting: "Hey you!"
• Older people greeting you and saying: "Welcome Home"

All of this within the context of about 3,500 shelters of varying construction: plastic sheeting, tin, wood, cardboard; on an area the size of a soccer field (which it was: the goal posts have become the stabilisers for a lucky few). A wide, mostly stagnant, canal runs parallel and carries away some of the sewerage.

And in amongst all of this, even as your mind is trying to make sense of the myriad informants - the smells, the sights, the sounds - and convinces itself that in any normal world this whole experience is offensive, a young man walks confidently into the frame, obviously dolled up with hair slick, clothes smart, small bag hanging off one arm and a beautiful, brightly coloured, sweetly smelling bouquet of flowers carefully protected in the other. What could his story be: is he courting one of the young girls up the next corridor getting her hair done, or is he visiting a relative who has lost family?

Even now, just over six months after the earthquake, an average of 12 bodies are recovered each day. As I drove past a wall in town this morning, I saw some amazingly beautiful graffiti on a broken wall. It was a relief map of Haiti; but look closely and buried in the colours that form a mountain range are two eyes from which two tears are falling. Alongside the map, the words: "We Still Need YOUR Help".